Krishnamurti

June 18, 2010, Georgetown, CO; elev. 8600’
08:12:46, hours MDT
...continued hiker’s journal…

Yesterday, Blake and his friend rode bike’s over and stopped up to see me about sundown. He looks good on the outside. Told me he and his brother and Mom went to TX to see her bf and go all over. He sounded as if he were enjoying himself. I like that he stops by. I wonder how he is doing with the circumstances in his family, however. When he comes around by himself the opportunity to actually talk w/ him may present itself.

Here at the house the pesky plastic fire-alarms on the ceilings have for a reason unknown been ‘chirping’. The morning walk w/ Ellie-Mae up on the narrow-gauge tracks began and finished nicely. Was 38° at approx. 06:15 hours. Wore the khaki/flannel over-shirt from the donation table over at Arid.

The right leg is nearly healed and much stronger. Funny thing folks― when my body injures itself, my mind loops in those automatic thoughts telling my limbic system that…’this is the way it is going to be no matter what’. (Is this at all similar to your experiences?)…This automatic response to injury can hamper my attitude and at times, certainly does, which provides me the deleterious capability to forget about the wondrous powers of healing physically. The leg is much stronger now and all the training is paying off. Going along w/ the diet and sleep hygiene over the past weeks I’ve managed to build in rest, restfulness and the stretching asanas― to limber up. This combination talks to my being in a way that makes my attitude more confident. I am ready and in good shape to go over to NRIM for a set of hikes. Am thinking about both on the NRIM and South.

It is 08:26:09 now and the sun-up has arrived on the back-sunroom and now warmth and sunlight are streaming into the kitchen. I love the feeling of the strength of the rays on my face as I type here.

Wrote my father a PDF Father’s Day card and sent to my sister’s email address. I think it is in enough time for him to see it.

I am enjoying myself.

Seems all the distractions of the world wash away when I can sense the sunlight’s radiation on my skin and can sniff and smell the scents of the coniferous forest here when outside early in the mornings walking and working my body’s metabolism. Being willed Ellie-Mae by Blake has been a God-send in my opinion. Gives us both reason to walk off the leash!

Here is yesterday’s meditation; as it speaks to me I pray it does similar for you.
Meditations from the Mat, Rolf Gates and Katrina Kenison

Day 143
Society does not want individuals who are alert, keen, revolu-
tionary, because such individuals will not fit into the established
social pattern and they may break it up. That is why society
seeks to hold your mind in its pattern, and why your so-called
education encourages you to imitate, to follow, to conform.
J. Krishnamurti

“I am not in a position to comment on your education. Mine was a mixed bag. On the whole it was helpful. Math in particular, though I found it loathsome at the time, sharpened my wits. History taught me to love and respect the beauty of our collective experience. My graduate program in social work helped me see the extent to which I turned a blind eye to the suffering around me. None of it, however, taught me that the love I seek is my own. I did not learn in school that the deep longing I have for this or that outcome is actually the longing I have to be at peace with myself. This information was not in any classroom I ever entered; rather, it was passed on to me be the sages I encountered later, and by every person who has spoken to me honestly. This wisdom is in the smile of my dog’s eye, it is the very music of the earth, the resounding truth of the ages― and it can only be heard when we are still. I share Krishnamurti’s words with you not to cast aspersions on your education, but to remind you that there is another education waiting for you, and that the teacher will be your heart.”

Remember…remember how you long for this or that outcome? Yes, of course you do and what happens to your being when your logicalness doesn’t pay so well?

This meditation speaks to the wholeness that I pray you find from time-to-time. This non-driven wonder of what Rolf and Katrina speak to in the above meditation. This being peace in the heart― peace with our- selves, regardless of how society shouts at us to do this or that― or else, beware of being smoted!

Have you acquired an ‘old-school’ education on top of your attendances at college or high school? At times my opinion had led me to believe that old-school opens doors in society― and to many extents this has been the case. This being attached to outcomes pretty much kills the peace in the heart.

My healing since Kyle’s death is similar to my metabolism and leg healing. At the outset stunned as I had become last January 16th when I was informed that indeed Kyle was dead my initial educated reaction was; Where am I going to find a replacement for my best friend and confidant…one who KNOWS me inside and will be dispassionate w/ me and honestly speak to me similar to the meditation above? My educated reaction to my leg becoming injured was similar― how am I going to manage to walk and backpack and still be athletic when now the leg is nearly lame? How am I going to be now that my body’s agility has been compromised?

The meditation speaks to me about remembering that this or that desired outcome is a nice system of thoughts and reactions bringing into being a direction that taps my limbic system. Being at peace w/ me has little to do with my education but does have more to do with enjoying myself and entering into the realms of happiness and tranquility. This calm or stillness or serenity is not so quiet. It is whereby the means to smile like Rolf’s dog smiles at him swirls into and around my being. I sense this smile in Ellie’s eye at times and does she worry as about the IRS or the BP oil-rig debacle unfolding in the Gulf? Does she worry how her nails look and which attire to don at which occasion? No! Let me disabuse you of any other notion here.
――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――
In my humble opinion it is doing…(asana)…what I love to do, whether it be avocation, occupation, work ,reading noteworthy literature and books, hobby, vocation, volunteering to do something that has benefit for others and exercising my metabolism and allowing my body to work for me. The latter has lots of significance for my living at this time as it has for the past five years. I love exercising
the metabolism the most I suppose. Being stuck inside a mobile as Bob Dylan sang about has served in the past to be one of those teaching sessions that I cast no aspersions toward you folks. Your stuck inside a mobile may well look different from my-stuck. My stuck ness certainly was at times ‘having to go to the job’ certainly was all the street-smarts that helped me to survive and thrive at various eras in my living, however it is the working of my body which brings me peace with me. This working my body’s metabolism culminates with reading and involving my body/mind in the varying avocations made available to me in this American society. I wonder how others w/ less fortunate lives find this peace within their beings. It seems to me to be more important than to dress for success and sip lattes at places where people in America go to be seen.
I am ready for the Trip to AZ now and about the only thing remaining will be timing. The Arid Club is hosting its annual Father’s Day potluck at Morris Park in Lakewood and I liked the atmosphere there last year. Should I attend I will bring a watermelon or two. My Father’s Day obligations are okay, I wrote to my father…outside of this there is not much else other than the 80 mile RT drive to the Club and picnic,; or I can be on the way through the Mtns. of Colorado on my way to NRIM.

This portion of the meditation ―> “… None of it, however, taught me that the love I seek is my own. I did not learn in school that the deep longing I have for this or that outcome is actually the longing I have to be at peace with myself….” And this―> “Society does not want individuals who are alert, keen, revolu-
tionary, because such individuals will not fit into the established
social pattern and they may break it up. That is why society
seeks to hold your mind in its pattern, and why your so-called
education encourages you to imitate, to follow, to conform.”

― these portions above ring so clear. Clear as the bells here in town tolled on the hour during daylight hours, especially on the weekends. Clear as the coniferous scenting on the breezes and clear as the morning daylight making the night time sky come alive. The so-called education prepared me little.

The longing to be at peace with myself is so clear and abundant today. Today was the clearing in my mind so that I could write about this again. I smile as I pray you are able to, as well. Thank you to these sages and people through-out the timeline of living; who have availed themselves and spoke with me honestly, I’m grateful.

Remember friends―> ‘enjoy yourself’!